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InFullBloom Archives


Speaking Engagements

Predict and Prepare sponsored by Workday 12/16

The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #171, 2/15
The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #160, 8/14
The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #145, 1/14
Workday Predict and Prepare Webinar, 12/10/2013
The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #134, 8/13
CXOTalk: Naomi Bloom, Nenshad Bardoliwalla, and Michael Krigsman, 3/15/2013
Drive Thru HR, 12/17/12
The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #110, 8/12
Webinar Sponsored by Workday: "Follow the Yellow Brick Road to Business Value," 5/3/12 Audio/Whitepaper
Webinar Sponsored by Workday: "Predict and Prepare," 12/7/11
HR Happy Hour - Episode 118 - 'Work and the Future of Work', 9/23/11
The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #87, 9/11
Keynote, Connections Ultimate Partner Forum, 3/9-12/11
"Convergence in Bloom" Webcast and accompanying white paper, sponsored by ADP, 9/21/10
The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #63, 9/10
Keynote for Workforce Management's first ever virtual HR technology conference, 6/8/10
Knowledge Infusion Webinar, 6/3/10
Webinar Sponsored by Workday: "Predict and Prepare," 12/8/09
Webinar Sponsored by Workday: "Preparing to Lead the Recovery," 11/19/09 Audio/Powerpoint
"Enterprise unplugged: Riffing on failure and performance," a Michael Krigsman podcast 11/9/09
The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #39, 10/09
Workday SOR Webinar, 8/25/09
The Bill Kutik Radio Show® #15, 10/08

Keynote, HR Tech Europe, Amsterdam, 10/25-26/12
Master Panel, HR Technology, Chicago, 10/9/012
Keynote, Workforce Magazine HR Tech Week, 6/6/12
Webcast Sponsored by Workday: "Building a Solid Business Case for HR Technology Change," 5/31/12
Keynote, Saba Global Summit, Miami, 3/19-22/12
Workday Rising, Las Vegas, 10/24-27/11
HR Technology, Las Vegas 10/3-5/11
HR Florida, Orlando 8/29-31/11
Boussias Communications HR Effectiveness Forum, Athens, Greece 6/16-17/11
HR Demo Show, Las Vegas 5/24-26/11
Workday Rising, 10/11/10
HRO Summit, 10/22/09
HR Technology, Keynote and Panel, 10/2/09

Adventures of Bloom & Wallace

a work in progress

Thomas Wailgum Inspired Post #2 — A Further Airing Of Grievances


Personal Grievances Were Never Part Of My HRM Object Model So I'm Improvising

Last month I had a terrific time airing a list of the grievances, just some of the routine annoyances, of my professional life.  Well, that felt so good that I began making a similar list for my personal life.  I hadn’t meant to share that personal list, but then a few of these sort of hit me between the eyes over the last few weeks, and I decided that there’s no purpose in having a blog if you can’t vent on whatever topics you choose.  So, here goes (in no particular order):  

Personal grievance #1 — Snooty social-climbing ladies who lunch who presume that careers are for husbands. Yes, these women still exist in 2011 right here in Paradise.  And I’m not talking about retired ladies, but about women who’ve never had a career thought in their heads, until their big bucks husbands turn them in for younger models. 
Personal grievance #2 — Flight attendants in business or first class who presume male passengers need/deserve more attention than females.  Don’t they realize that attitude went out with the men in their grey flannel suits?  I can’t tell you what a pleasure it is to be greeted in business class on an international flight as though I had every right to be there, and not just because Ron’s a gold mine.  Hmmm…I think #2 is connected to #1.

Personal grievance #3 — Most commercial TV.  When did the lowest common denominator get so low?  Who the hell cares about Snookie!  And who on earth are the Kardashians?  Why would anyone waste time peering into the dysfunctional lifestyles of the stupid and ugly?  I’m clearly not a good candidate for most consumer marketing, but I’m sure a reliable contributor to Masterpiece Theater.     

Personal grievance #4 — Boom box cars playing absolute crap at 500 db stopped next to me in heavy traffic.  I keep hoping their eardrums will explode all over their windshields, but then I worry that they’ll cause an accident.  Don’t these people have parents?  Don’t these parents have any brains? 
Personal grievance #5 — Calories!  By now the scientists should have figured out how to squeeze them out of my food.  With all the money being spent on myriad ways to lose weight, from exercise equipment to all the recalled diet drugs, not to mention on every flavor of cosmetic improvement (you’d know that I’m living in the center of the plastic surgery universe if you could just see the results in any upmarket restaurant between Sarasota and Naples), but you never hear about serious efforts to suck the calories out of, say, M&Ms or bagels.  You’d think that the VCs would be all over this.  Hmmm… nope, not an entrepreneurial inspiration for this gal.
Personal grievance #6 (which is closely related to #5) — The entire fashion industry’s lack of interest in anyone under 5’10” and/or over 120 lbs, which is almost all of us.  Men buy clothes sized to their actual measurements with perhaps a little shortening of a sleeve here or a pant leg there as needed — and always provided by the shop.  Women buy clothes that will never fit because there are no clothes that do fit.  If you’re short and weigh nothing, there’s petites.  If you’re an Amazon and weigh a lot, there are plus sizes.  But if you’re short and weigh a lot, there’s nothing, absolutamenta nada.  And forget alterations unless you’re shopping at Neiman Marcus, which certainly doesn’t cater to whatever non-size I am.
Personal grievance #7 (just so you’ve got one for every day) — Family members you only hear from when they’re trying to make up the numbers at a wedding or funeral or wherever they need relatives to show off to their friends.  I’m blessed with some terrific relatives, folks I call friends in spite of the blood ties and shared childhoods, but there are some who didn’t make the cut, and deservedly so.  If you’re an A list relative and are reading this, please plan a visit to Paradise so we can laugh at the ladies in #1, commiserate over # 5 & 6, sing at the top of our lungs with the top down to drown out #4, and watch old Masterpiece Theater masterpieces on DVD.
That felt great.  I may make this an annual post.


4 comments to Thomas Wailgum Inspired Post #2 — A Further Airing Of Grievances

  • Linda Galloway

    Thanks for the post! I always learn a lot from you and your writings; this one brought me several chuckles. Please do make this an annual event.

  • Bill Kutik

    As for squeezing out calories, my sister (an occasionally reliable source) reports that Nabisco has taken some of its favorite cookies and reduced them to 100 calorie wafers.

    You get all the taste of an Oreo, for instance, though not the tactile pleasure of crunching through the outside to the pure sugar inside. But many fewer calories.

    Sort of like astronaut food!

    Look for their displays should you ever get to a supermarket.

  • How about servers who had rather count tips than take care of their customers? Last night Dory and I decided to eat at the bar and skip the 20 minute wait. Okay, I can understand it if the place is slammed, but I don’t think washing glasses and counting tips is a higher priority than checking on your customers.

    I rat these people out in a picosecond.

    The manager was very accommodating and ushered us to a table. He had a great wine selection suggestion (ping me if you like pinot noirs)- and shared a glass with us.

  • […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Naomi Bloom. Naomi Bloom said: Naomi's new blog post: Thomas Wailgum Inspired Post #2 — A Further Airing Of Grievances […]

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